


far down

by orphan_account



Category: Undertale
Genre: Red - Freeform, Resets, Short Drabble, implied honeymustard, implied suicide, lil bit of implied abuse, names aren't mentioned but this is the swap universe, sorta sad i guess, vague af
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-30
Updated: 2016-08-30
Packaged: 2018-08-11 22:42:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7910410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>he was never worth it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	far down

Red stood. 

He stood on the top of his house, sneakers firm on the edge, but his body wavering like a tightrope that hadn't been tied tight enough, letting anyone that relied on him down. Far down.

The shining lights from the damp coolness of waterfall didn't seem real to him as he stared from a distance, face devoid of expression. He didn't know what to feel. Red didn't move as he sat on the frosted shingles of the roof, the roof of a strange house, the roof of something he couldn't be sure was real. He closed his eyes, just for a second, like maybe he could escape, the imprints of light fading behind his lids like his own life had faded so many times. 

It was something that only seemed to happen in stories, something so impossible it made him want to sleep for a long, long time. It wasn't really possible to be here, separate from everything he's ever known, with companions that seemed to follow him, favoring and loving him. One companion in particular, tall with a sense of forced relaxation surrounding him. Maybe he would miss that one. It was somehow calming to think about it. He could quit any day, go back to where he started, get a second chance like nothing mattered. It didn't.

Sometimes he wondered if he was insane, if in the blink of an eye he would wake up, shivering and dying in the snow like an animal shot down. He would begin to collapse into dust, his own body crumbling into his hands without a sound, the cold air blowing his remains like it was nothing important, something dirty and worthless and lowly regarded. He would not make a sound, too caught up in the devastating feeling that ripped through him, some survival instinct of him clawing and screaming for life but failing like Red himself did. Here a monster would be shocked to find his dust scattered through the winds, nothing but a frosted heap of clothes a mark of his entire existence. Gone like the wind that now stood still, letting flakes of snow rest on his shoulders. 

It was new here, something he could mess up so, so very easily. The bruises and bloody, dirty bandages were absent, harsh edges banished. It was soft and gentle here, making him look out of place with his jagged, gnarled teeth and his scarred body that looked like a beaten up doll. He had been through it all before, time and time again.

Here he stood, a new name on his face, torn sneakers at the edge of his newly adopted house, at the cliff of the unknown. The strangely familiar snow blew around him, whistling through his skull, making a sound akin to the wind chimes he used to see, before the rocks of Hotland were smeared with dust, before the time he had first found blood on his hands. Red's eyelights didn't gutter or flicker out like they used to, they instead stood in a serene, still dot, gazing across the underground, where the warm glow of house lights and the strong light of Hotland shone, the faint sparkles of Waterfall's gushing falls reaching him like the stars he would look at now and again. Dark.

It was quiet and still, so quiet that he briefly let the thought cross that he really was insane, something that seemed to fill up his blank mind. He couldn't bring himself to be frightened or let his mind race and drift like it used to. He felt numb, emotionless as he stared at the peaceful world below him, from the view of the rooftop, the rooftop coated in unbroken shingles that reached above all the others. This was such an amazing place, filled with others that cared for him unconditionally, but whatever humanity he had left in him wasn't worth it. He was never worth it. 

A foot stepped forwards, off the frosted surface, and he soaked in the beauty of this fucked up world as it turned black.


End file.
